Had a rubbish day

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Jen
joined 1 Nov 2006
45 posts

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Posted by Jen, 22:54 4 January 2008

I started a new job start of Sept but was away on training most of that month so Ive really only been there 3 months - 3 SAD months. I had my review today & my supervisor said I was basically doing okay but I need to do loads of reading to get me properly up to speed & I need to stop getting so stressed!!

Thing is, I'm so tired I havent had time to do much reading & when I do my brain just doesnt get it & it's so frustrating cos I know if it was summer I'd be fine!!

And I'm getting stressed cos I get stressed at everything in winter, I always react badly to stuff & then get over it!
But now Im more stressed cos they must be regretting taking me on as I've been so rubbish since I got there. Oh & I nearly cried at the review so they must also now think Im mental!!

But all this has made me wonder - do I get depressed because I feel like this & have no control over it?? Whereas Ive always thought my SAD was me getting depressed in winter & I had a few other symptoms, now I wonder if the other symptoms lead to the depression....hmmmm

Me
joined 29 Oct 2007
380 posts

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Posted by Me, 09:18 5 January 2008

SAD and situations that you cant control can add up to depression.

Personally, tiredness is the major culprit. When I can get that sorted, the world doesnt seem so bad and I dont feel like everyones out to get me!

I keep going on about exercise, but it does help to get my brain moving abit and reduce stress.

I wouldnt worry about your job too much. I took on a job once, and only lasted the morning - I really couldnt cope - So you are not doing that bad chuck. Do your best now, and dont fret so, you've got an ace to play in a couple of months!

Me x

Bagpuss
joined 10 Nov 2007
145 posts

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Posted by Bagpuss, 21:10 5 January 2008

Jen, I know how you feel. I start a new job next week and it feels like the worst possible time, because I'm so lacking in confidence during the winter and find it hard to concentrate. I've been thinking the same as you, what if I let them down and they regret choosing me. But by Spring, if you're anything like me you'll come to life and things will be fine. That's what I'm counting on anyway! Does your employer know you have SAD? Think you might be right about feeling out of control causing depression. I've felt less depressed since I accepted that I feel like this in winter rather than trying to fight it, especially since I found this website and realise I'm not the only one feeling this way.

Sticky Glitter Hands
joined 7 Jan 2008
8 posts

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Posted by Sticky Glitter Hands, 13:17 7 January 2008

Jen, you sound just like me - except that I started my job a year ago last November. Along with food intolerances, severe depression (which seems to lift for no apparent reason at times) and the everyday stresses one brings in to work, I often think my Managers must think "My God, what HAVE we landed ourselves with????"

I make stupid mistakes, which I then panic/worry/beat myself up over for ages - long after everyone else has forgotten them! But I'm still here all these months later. :o)

This SAD year (end of Oct until last week) have been the longest, hardest ever... not helped by me pigging out on chocolates etc *rolls eyes at self*

But... new year, new fight.... I'm determined to clean up my diet and DO something to get me out of the house and MEET PEOPLE (I'm so not a social butterfly).

Good luck, and hang in there :)

Northern Girl
joined 9 Jan 2008
1 posts

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Posted by Northern Girl, 18:54 9 January 2008

Jen, I know exactly how you feel. I have only just joined this forum today but already i feel better knowing that I'm not alone in dealing with this. I am so down and unable to cope wth stress at work that I keep calling in sick because i cant cope. But we all know that that is not the answer! Jen, just wow them with the real 'you' in spring. Good luck.

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