Exercise (puff, groan, gasp....)

Hi gang

Well, ok, so feeling almost* as awful as I normally feel in March I decided to take action (literally) to try to improve the situation. Recalling how many of you feel so buoyed up and vital by exercise, out came my bloody bike for the 3rd day running, and in between there has been my yoga class which this week was particularly gruelling.

The sun was shining and off I went wending my way down country lanes, up hill and down dale for yet another 5 miles. Tired, with stiff little legs, a breathless little body, and not far from home, I rested on the bench of the church in the middle of simply nowhere where hubby and I got married ... it's just a church, fields and sheep, I normally see it as lovely. But I have to say I wept, I was trying so hard to feel better, but exercise just doesn't do it for me........

Is there anyone else out there in a similar situation with exercise, or am I a freak as I suspect?

So, I gave up for the day, had a glass or two (three) of red wine and frankly no longer cared!

I will continue with my bike tomorrow and the day after, etc. but at present I don't hold out great hope for any emotional improvement though I appreciate the upside is being more physically fit, and that is indirectly uplifting

*if my March despair and bewilderment normally score 10, currently I am experiencing 6.

Julie, why are you punishing yourself? Yoga should not be gruelling. You don't need to go miles on your bike if you are not used to it. Well-being is not achieved only if one reaches a state of exhaustion. Just do what you like, in amounts that feel good for you. Can you go on walks, or do some gardening? Gentle exercise can be as healing as vigorous exercise, in some ways more so.

I used to drag myself to the gym 2 years ago, knowing I'd always feel better for it. It was hard because when the depression began I lost a lot of the energy I'd previously had. In a way that did work for me, but as you remember I was still overwhelmed by depression. It was just a temporary high like so many other strategies we know and have discussed here.

However, you might find that improving your fitness by the little-and-often route will help you to feel a bit better on a regular basis, and is sure to bring health benefits. It really does need to be something you truly enjoy.

Hope this helps,
Linda.

Hiya all

Well, darrell, thank you for the kind words and the reminder:
....."5) Ease up and stop beating yourself up ... this winter time will pass
6) Oh and if you've forgotten ... you're not alone".......
too true and I have often posted such wisdom, though I obviously fail to practice it myself!

Linda ... to be honest yoga was only gruelling as it was an intense class and my body was already exhausted. I don't have ME, but when I am in my March or September I have half my usual staying power and endurance, almost everything is physically exhausting and emotionally draining.

And, yes, I do beat myself up, I do push myself ... but I am of that generation whose blueprint is "work, no melingering, get to the end of the day and look back at the fantastic list of things done and achieved..." and my formative years of 6-11 were spent in a Dickensian boarding school ~ I need say no more really!

Anyway, will try harder (!) to beat myself up less, but still need to know why exercise does not work for me. In the summer I love nothing better than riding my bike and walking by way of exercise.

Barefootlass (lovely name!) I have no idea why you are cross at the end of a good sesh of yoga, I am usually so spaced out I wonder if it's safe to actually drive myself home!! Do you feel physically good though? Hope so! Yes, I will garden and attend to my hens this weekend, I do find that therapeutic ... it was just that elusive exercise-fix I was after!

As I type this, my 23 year old son is challenging me to ride my bike for that up-hill down-dale 5 mile route as he jogs it....... so that puts me in a spot, I don't allow myself to fail and I think I just might either way ... if I don't go I fail, if I do go and can't keep up, guess what, I fail again.

:roll:

I suppose personal discipline must be my forte...............

Well, I went for the bike ride with jogging oh-so-fit son...... he was sweet with me, and so encouraging that I really could not let him down, or claim that he forced me to go. I could just about peddle as fast as he jogs and he still managed to talk to me as he ran (!)..... but, I made it somehow, all 5 miles, it took 40 minutes!

With a "well done Mum" I collapsed on the sofa. The well done mum bit did lift my spirits, so this time I guess there was an upside :)

Thanks Linda, I have read a number of books on a similar theme, but I will look that one out. But, I confess that, though I absorb and make mental notes of all that I am learning, it is short lived unless I read the book over and over, ad infinitum.

I'm like a piece of elastic really, I can stretch myself and puff up with good intentions, come alive really … but left unattended without constant input I recoil to my original state. I positively fill up with renewed vigour and good intentions as long as I am receiving powerful encouragement, the minute it stops, poufff, back to square one. But this is classic really for any issues one has in life - dieting, giving up alcohol/drugs, starting at the gym, New Years Resolutions, not rising to the bait, trying to be one's own best friend, well the list is simply endless.

Apologies that this has been a rather me me me post, I actually hate drawing attention/being in the limelight, just got desperate I guess. Thanks for reading me :)